Back to school time for a bereaved parent can be an emotional and painful reminder of our greatest loss.
When we see commercials of children excited about starting their first day of school, we think about our own child who should be doing the same thing. Watching the school buses drive past the house can be gut wrenching.
My daughter just started school, and though I was happy and excited for her, I couldn’t help thinking about her brother who would be going into seventh grade. Since they are only a year apart, when I dropped her off, I saw all of the other boys who had started to grow up over the summer. I thought about how he would look, act, sound and what classes he would enjoy.
Tears filled my eyes as I said goodbye to my daughter and she stepped out of the car. My tears flowed as I drove away from the school. Another milestone for her, but another one missed for my son. I guess there will always be points in our lives where the sadness and disappointment takes over, even in the happiest of moments.
To all bereaved parents, be gentle with yourself during these days ahead. If you have recently lost a school age child or if you have lost a baby who would be going to school, this time may be difficult. Try to clear your head by taking walks, meditating or writing a letter to your child.
If you feel the need to cry, let it out. It’s okay to cry. Release the pain you feel in your heart. Focus on surrounding yourself with people who understand and doing hobbies that you enjoy. You will be okay…
For further reading for bereaved parents, read: Loss Of A Child, Understanding The Emotions Of Grief.
Image courtesy of Gualberto107 at freedigitalphotos.net
My son died at 39 on Oct 2014. Whenever I go into a store I notice babies on up and feel a crushing pain thinking of him at those ages. It doesn’t matter what age, the pain is harsh beyond anything else a mother could possibly endure. I’m trying to figure out how mothers survive this.
I think we just go on auto pilot until we learn how to live with it in our own unique way. I am so sorry for your loss. It’s been almost 13 years since my infant son Alex died. It gets easier, but still a void that will never be filled. ((Hugs))